lessons Archives

10 Lessons Our Son’s Life Has Taught Us

April 15, 2021/0 Comments/in Everything, Faith, God's Miracles, God's Promises, Uncategorized /by Heather Gillis

This year marks the 10th anniversary of our son Bowen’s passing. In 2011, our lives have been changed forever. We wanted to share, how he has impacted our life over the past 10 years. We wouldn’t be where we are today nor would we be doing what we’re doing if it weren’t for our son Bowen and what God has done in our lives.

Here are 10 lessons Our Son’s Life Has Taught Us:

Lesson #10- HOPE is for REAL. We named our son Bowen, because of its meaning, ‘small victorious one.’ He truly lives us to his name in heaven where the victory has already been won. Because of Bowen, we founded Bowen’s Hope in 2013, where we helped kidney kids who had kidney disease and their families at the Phoenix Children’s Hospital. We came up with the acronym for Bowen’s Hope B- Bringing, O- Others, W-What, E-Everyone, N- Needs, HOPE!!!!! Because of what we went through, we realized there were other families who deal with their child who has kidney disease, which can be so demanding mentally and physically. God used our pain for HIS greater purpose to help at the kids’ kidney camp, called Camp Maska, get families sponsored for Christmas, and hold toiletry drives to help with some of their needs. God showed us the true meaning of coming alongside others in their hurt. When we set out to help others, they end up helping us more than we help them.

“who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 2 Corinthians 1:4

Lesson #9- The Joy of Less. We have more when we have Less. Bowen taught us how precious life really is, every life matters, and to cherish every moment. Life is too short to be filled with things and stuff that doesn’t matter. To live simply and have less, is to have more time for adventure, making memories and spending time together. Our stuff taught us you don’t own stuff, stuff owns you. You can read more of our story in “Chicken Soup for the Soul: The Joy of Less.”

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroy and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21 NASB

Lesson #8- We can do hard things in Christ. Bowen’s life taught us not to let the pain of suffering consume us but to pour it into something positive for the greater good. His life took us to places we never imagined or thought were possible. After Bowen, I started running and training and qualified for the Boston Marathon in 2013. Sadly that was the same year the Boston bombing occurred.

'I can do all things through Christ who gives us strength.' Philippians 4:13Click To Tweet

I don’t have a picture with my medal smiling after the finish line, because we were trying to get safely back to our hotel in the midst of crowds, police cars and SWAT teams all around us. The bombing taught us when we run in fear there will always be another finish line to cross, when we run in the victory of Christ there is only one finish line to cross and never have to run in fear again. The other picture is my husband at the finish line of the Iron Man he completed in AZ. We would have never have been able to accomplish all these things without the strength of Jesus and our son giving us the courage to say I can.

Lesson #7- Kindness Matters. Our Son’s life taught us every life matters and is valuable. Everyone deserves kindness no matter who they are. Kindness is a gift from God. If no one received kindness no one would know the love of Jesus. Bowen’s life challenged us to extend kindness to others by doing a 13 Day Kindness challenge for everyday he was alive. Doing acts of kindness was so healing, and allowed the legacy of Bowen’s life to live on. Giving kindness to someone can be the key to their breakthrough and the very thing they need. Be the kindness this world needs. Kindness is contagious. Pass it on.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another.” Ephesians 4:13

FREE Kindness Cards Click to Download

#12DaysofKindnes

Lesson #6- Life is Better together. Even though we didn’t choose for our son’s life to be taken by this horrible disease, time and time again, every race we ran, every fundraiser, every event put on in honor of Bowen, brought people TOGETHER. Life is meant to do and LIVE TOGETHER in UNITY with one another. Matthew 18:20- “For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them.”

1 Peter 4:8-9 “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.”

Lesson #5- How Beautiful are the Feet that Bring Good News. If there is One thing God is able to do is bring Beauty out of Ashes. Here are beautiful works of art people made for me after Bowen died. One is a beautiful portrait of our son where his his body is preserved untouched by his disease. Another is the Beautiful feet picture of the Bible verse in Romans 10:15. Another is a picture someone painted I didn’t even know, God placed in her heart to paint and give us this picture with the verse By His Stripes we are healed Isaiah 53:5. The last picture is a Bowen’s beautiful name tattooed on my foot, (thank goodness we will have beautiful feet in heaven LOL) for anyone who asks I can tell them how beautiful are the feet that bring good news—His name indeed brings good news, that we will see Him again One day in heaven. God is able to turn our Tests into Testimonies our Misery into His Message our Trials into Treasures.

Lesson #3- Be Thankful. Our son’s Life taught us to Be Thankful for what you have, it could always Be Worse. There is always something to Be thankful for no matter what your circumstances. Thankfulness helped us get through some very tough times—when we were grateful it turned what we had into enough and more than we ever needed. You never know when will be the last time to see a loved one or be here on this earth. Spending our time being grateful is time well spent.

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. #quote #MelodyBeattie

Lesson #2- Live life with Adventure and with more margin. Bowen’s life allowed us to get rid of a lot of clutter and distractions in our lives and trade them in for making memories and adventures with our family. More Margin allowed for schedules to be free to allow for spontaneous moments and for the unexpected. He showed us the meaning of seeking adventure and allowing room for it in our lives. Leaving margin allows us to be available in God’s timing to be vessels when he needs us to be his hands and feet. Click Here to watch our adventures from Alaska.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

Lesson #1-God Can Turn UnAnswered prayers Into Something Better. God doesn’t always answer our prayers the way we want them but answers them in a bigger way than we could ever imagine. We prayed for Bowen to be healed and for him to come home. When he died, at first I thought God didn’t answer our prayers, Why? But then I realized God did answer our prayers, just not in the way we wanted. He indeed heal Bowen and brought him home to heaven.

Our son taught us—When God is all you have God is all have, God is all you need. There is no sorrow on earth that God can’t heal (David Crowder lyrics). Our son’s short life continues and will continue to teach us so much. We have valued and cherished our time with Bowen’s Hope but had to close this chapter of our lives. Even though this chapter closed, God continues to open new chapters and continues to use Bowen to be apart of our lives, just in a different way. He will continue to challenge us and make us step through new doors of opportunity wherever that may lead us.

Our son has taught us more in these 10 years than we would have ever done on our own. What the enemy uses for evil God will use for good (Genesis 50:20).Click To Tweet

God is good all the time no matter what our circumstances or trials we go through. I hope and pray these lessons we’ve learned can be applies to our everyday lives and never forget why we are here–to love one another and allow our trials to grow us.

To celebrate and honor our son’s life for his 10 year anniversary, our goal is to have 10 kids through Compassion International be sponsored. So far 3 kids have been sponsored and need 7 more families to reach our goal! We have really enjoyed sponsoring Victor, who we started sponsoring after Bowen died. Would you consider sponsoring a child? To read our story visit instagram to read more.

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You Were Made For Greatness: 10 Lessons We Learn From David

June 13, 2020/4 Comments/in Bible study, Everything, Faith, Struggles/Trials /by Heather Gillis

You were made for greatness. All of us were. This is the first time I’ve written on my blog in six months, it was good to take a much-needed break to be able to rest and focus on a writing project I’m working on. I’ve had the opportunity to review this amazing book”. I AM David, 10 Lessons in Greatness. What a great and timely message to share. I LOVED this book and EVERYTHING I learned. This book is one of my favorite ways to study the Bible, study the person, and what they go through, study their flaws, strengths, make them human and relatable.

Dr. Jimmy Evans is a Pastor of Gateway Church in Texas and founder CEO of MarriageToday. He is author of many other books and hosts of the TV show The Overcoming Life. In his books and television show, it’s apparent his mission is to help others step into the greatness God created them for—to be overcomers in Christ.

Life has so many defeating circumstances it’s hard not to be overwhelmed by them. I AM David gives 10 valid, relatable lessons through the faith, strengths, weakness, failures, and successes of David. His life and heart have paved a pathway for greatness we can follow. Here are my favorite lessons from the book.

10 Lessons of Greatness we learn from David:

1. “You won’t discover your true greatness until you find it on the battlefield.”— When you read about David in the Bible, he was one of great valor, what great leaders were made of, he even was good looking. I love his perspective of what makes us great isn’t in our accomplishments, it’s staying on the battlefield. We all know the scened when David goes to the rooftop, sees Bathsheba, has an affair, covers it up by having her husband killed. I didn’t realize in the context I’ve read many times before, David was supposed to be out of the battlefield not on the rooftop getting into trouble! “The rooftop is a place of darkness, where people try to escape from God’s will for their lives” (quote Jimmy Evans). He says the rooftop will always rob us of being great. The devil knows our weakness and will take every opportunity to put us in the right place for us to fail. You can’t hide from sin. Sometimes we retreat to those rooftops out of fear of what we will face on the battlefield. We will always have fears but can trust in God’s courage to get us through, it is enough. We have to face our fears, commit to courage, and do what’s right despite our fears.

“The secret of peace is not resting on the rooftop. It is winning on the battlefield” #Quote #IAMDavid #JimmyEvansClick To Tweet

2. “Taking responsibility is what makes the difference between failure and success.” Amen to that! If there is one quality about David I admire was his ability to own his own stuff, be willing to admit, ‘I messed up, please forgive me.’ He didn’t use blame, avoid, run, or hide from his sin, he repented and became one of the greatest leaders of the Bible because he took responsibility for his own actions.

3. “Rise above the pain of the past.”— Have you ever met someone who always played the victim card and wasn’t able to move beyond their past? I’m here to tell you, the past does not need you anymore, the future does. I didn’t realize from David’s upbringing his possible strained relationship with his dad and rejection by his brother Eliab could have played a part in David’s choices. It’s so important to acknowledge the wounds of our hearts and deal with them, not to substitute other things to mend them like alcohol, drugs, food, or work. There comes a time where we have to make the decision and ask am I willing to be well? Or do I want to keep lingering in the past? Facing the pain of our past can be one of the most freeing things we can do to severe the chains of bondage.

4. David the worshipper- One can’t read the Bible without going through the book of Psalms or memorizing a few lines from it. Psalms is filled with David’s heartache and praises. His ability to praise and worship God is one of the most astounding accounts in the Bible. I admit I can fail in this department and question when I don’t feel God near, oh it’s because of my poor worship! I love how David is able to be real with his feeling and emotions and create this intimate relationship with God. It’s a place to get rid of your bitterness, anger, and pride, lay it at God’s feet and allow Him to have it. Worship invites God’s presence to be powerful in our lives. Worship is worth no matter the cost. It helps us turn away from laziness and make our focus on God and not other things distracting us in our lives. In order to be great, we have “to be willing to esteem God more than the opinion of others.”

“Worship without a price is false worship” #quote Jimmy Evans I AM DavidClick To Tweet

5. Be Positive Regardless of the Circumstances- David has a pretty impressive track record on the battlefield. He killed lions and bears when he was a shepherd boy, he led mighty men to win many battles, he thought like a winner, battles were won and giants fell. He had “faith-focused thinking that was God-directed and reward-oriented.” He believed in the living God when he fought Goliath. The stone didn’t kill him his faith and Go’s power did. He didn’t overthink what if? Or how will I be able? He just went for it. He was under the authority and covenant of God, Goliath wasn’t, therefore David was under God’s protection. When we are under God’s protection we can defeat any enemy!

“If the only tool you have is a hammer, you will see every problem as a nail.”

When we fight for God, we must accept the fact we will have resistance. Sometimes we need to change our tools to fight, not every problem will be a nail. Don’t let resistance keep you back from greatness.

6. Submit to God’s Authority and to those He Delegates— If there is one theme in the Bible is half-hearted obedience. One reason why king Saul was no longer king was because of his disobedience. If we can’t submit to authority then we think we know best and are in charge, not God. God is the creator of authority and will not tolerate rebellion. I meet a lot of people who say they are believers. They believe in the Jesus died for my sins part, but not always the LORD of my life part. “Salvation requires submission.” We can’t be the authority in our own lives and be. Submission is the way and path to true greatness.

“Submission to authority opens God’s heart and hand to us as we walk in His will.”

7. Admit Weakness and Become Accountable to Others— Great leaders, admit their mistakes and learn from them. Learning how to be transparent and humble will be one of your greatest attributes. Hiding behind fears, shame, and failure will never get us anywhere. One way to achieve this is to have an accountability person in your life that can speak into blind spots. One thing David did well, was listen to others in his life, having anointed wise ministers that could help him live in his greatest potential.

8. Depend on God and Give Him the Glory- We can all fall victim to the whispers of pride. We see all the time those who rise to power, fall hard once greed and pride take over their lives. Arrogance will never serve us well and God will make sure pride will never succeed. When choose to walk in surrender and submission we choose to walk in humility with God. The place of humbleness is where God protects us. Places of pride is where satan pounces and preys on his victims to make them fall. David had his moment in 1 Chronicles 21 when he took the census. He depended on his own strength and not God’s. One question that struck me hard Jimmy asks is, “How much can God give me before I use it against him?” Woah. I have been guilty many times of throwing things back in God’s face and giving Him a list of all the things I’ve done. Then I’m reminded where I need to be, on my knees praying in a place of worship, giving Him the glory.

9. Overcome discouragement- “Every great man or woman of God must overcome times of darkness and deep discouragement in order to achieve his or her destiny in God.” We all have experienced devastation in our lives. It’s so easy to give in to despair. We can learn from David what Satan uses for evil God uses for good. To be attacked by the devil is to be expected, you never know what God does behind the scenes. God always has an answer for the victory and is in control. Nothing is impossible for him.

10. Be Willing- None of David’s greatness would be possible is he wasn’t willing to be willing. “All of us are destined for greatness if we choose to surrender to God and His plan for our lives.”

You were made for greatness–God’s greatness. Satan will do everything possible to tear you away from God’s plans for His greatness in your life. Remember the lessons from David, one of the greatest leaders, warriors, and kings of the Bible.

What is your favorite lesson from David?

I recommend this book to anyone who has a desire for greatness. Who desires to learn and want to be well. I hope you consider reading I AM David and be blessed for all it has to offer. We can learn so much from David. Sometimes it’s not about getting to the outcome we desire, it’s what we learn along the way. Thank you Pastor Jimmy Evans for writing this book!

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Do You Know What You Need?

March 22, 2019/2 Comments/in Bible study, Christianity, Encouragement, Everything, Faith, God's Love, Uncategorized /by Heather Gillis

Do you know what you need?

I can tell you better what I want more than what I need. I want a big piece of chocolate cake without reaping the consequences. I want my kids to be obedient without giving me a hard time. I want to work less, sleep in and go on vacation more. The same goes for my kids. I ask are you hungry, do you want something to eat? Ten minutes later they tell me they’re hungry. I’ve learned over the years don’t do what they say, do what they need.

What I need? That’s a different story. I know I need to be discipline even though I don’t want to. If I wasn’t disciplined I would eat whatever I wanted, let time go by and never get anything done.

Not knowing what we need is apart of most of our stories.

Did you know in America there are over 52,000 Self-Storage units? That means despite the 65% of Americans who already have garages to store ‘stuff,’ there’s an additional 21 extra feet to store more ‘stuff.’

In a study of overeating rats, Scientists examined their eating habits and their reward system (dopamine receptors). What they found was once the rats started down the path of overeating it drove them towards a dysfunctional reward system. In order to feel the ‘reward’ or satisfaction of eating they had to eat more in order to feel the ‘reward,’ which led them to their downfall.

It makes me question with our hoarding and addictive tendencies, do we even know what we need?Click To Tweet

Give me what I need not what I want.

One story in the Bible reminds me of what happens when we look within and seek God for provision instead of relying on ourselves or the world to rescue us.

In 2 Kings, a widow who was in financial trouble came to Elisha who her husband had worked for. She tells Elisha of her troubles, how creditors are looking for her. Elisha asks her, “How can I help you? Tell me, what do you have in your house? (2 Kings 4:2). She tells him I don’t have anything except a small jar of oil.

Elisha then tells her go to your neighbors and ask for jars, bring them back to your house, shut the door, pour the oil into all the jars and put them to the side (2 Kings 4:4).

“She left him and shut the door behind her and her sons. They brought the jars to her and she kept pouring until they were full” (2 Kings 4:5).

3 Lessons from the Heart:

Three important lessons can be learned from this message.

1. She Chose Wisdom. Out of desperation, the widow who was in fear of losing her two sons to the creditor as slaves, turned towards Elisha, a man of wisdom. As a widow she was in a desperate situation, no husband, no way to financially provide for her sons, she chose to seek counsel of a wise man (Elisha) instead of acting out her fear.

2. God Provided. Elisha asked, “What do you have?” When the widow came to Elisha, he didn’t immediately dive in to rescue her by giving her what she needed, he pointed her to look within to see what she already had. As Christians we are called to love others, but we also can be guilty of taking over the role as the Savior and rescue people from their situations instead of helping them gain the skills they need to do for themselves. There comes a time when helping helps and when helping hurts. Elisha didn’t create a cycle of dependency, he gave her the skills to utilize the resources she already had.

3. God Multiplied. The oil never stopped flowing until all the jars were filled. God used what she had and made it plentiful, into more than she needed. Elisha said, “Go, sell the oil and pay your debts. You and your sons can live on what is left. (2 Kings 4:7). The jar plan Elisha told her, sounded kind of crazy. But she trusted and obeyed and God multiplied what she had.

How Amazing is our God?

One thing the widow did that makes an impression on my heart is how she embraced the suffering. She was dealing with the grief of her husband, having to be the primary breadwinner/caretaker of her sons and deal with everything on her own. She didn’t throw her hands up, say ‘I give up,’ and let her sons be sold as slaves.

When she pursued wisdom and embraced the suffering, it drastically changed her situation.Click To Tweet

What do you need?

Looking at our world, there is an epidemic of brokenness. A world that turns towards crime, drugs, prostitution, eating, hoarding to fill a void of something we all desperately need–LOVE.

We can have everything taken from us but if we still have love, we have everything we need. Things and stuff can be replaced but the love from others cannot.

God’s love is the solution to brokenness.

God's love has the power to mend and provide in ways this world can never do. Click To TweetDo you need Love? Leave a comment below how can I pray for you?

The best way to receive love is to give it. Who can you love on? A widow, a person who needs groceries, a parent who could use a date night? Every small act of kindness makes an impact in someone else’s life.

Prayer- Dear Lord, Give me what I need, not what I want. When I ask for what I want, it makes me dependent upon worldly things that leaves me only wanting more temporary rewards. I need you Lord. I want you God. You are my Maker, my Lord who knows what I need. Help me seek you, stay focused on you so you can give me the desires of my heart. Help me be like the widow, who chose wisdom, had faith and trusted in you Lord and allowed you to lead her Lord. I thank you and praise you for who you are. In Jesus name, Amen.

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