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10 Lessons Our Son’s Life Has Taught Us

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This year marks the 10th anniversary of our son Bowen’s passing.  In 2011, our lives have been changed forever.  We wanted to share, how he has impacted our life over the past 10 years.  We wouldn’t be where we are today nor would we be doing what we’re doing if it weren’t for our son Bowen and what God has done in our lives.

Here are 10 lessons Our Son’s Life Has Taught Us:

Lesson #10-  HOPE is for REAL. We named our son Bowen, because of its meaning,  ‘small victorious one.’   He truly lives us to his name in heaven where the victory has already been won. Because of Bowen, we founded Bowen’s Hope in 2013, where we helped kidney kids who had kidney disease and their families at the Phoenix Children’s Hospital.  We came up with the acronym for Bowen’s Hope B- Bringing, O- Others, W-What, E-Everyone, N- Needs, HOPE!!!!!  Because of what we went through, we realized there were other families who deal with their child who has kidney disease, which can be so demanding mentally and physically. God used our pain for HIS greater purpose to help at the kids’ kidney camp, called Camp Maska, get families sponsored for Christmas, and hold toiletry drives to help with some of their needs.  God showed us the true meaning of coming alongside others in their hurt.  When we set out to help others, they end up helping us more than we help them.

 “who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.”  2 Corinthians 1:4

Lesson #9- The Joy of Less.   We have more when we have Less.  Bowen taught us how precious life really is, every life matters, and to cherish every moment. Life is too short to be filled with things and stuff that doesn’t matter. To live simply and have less, is to have more time for adventure, making memories and spending time together. Our stuff taught us you don’t own stuff, stuff owns you. You can read more of our story in “Chicken Soup for the Soul:  The Joy of Less.”

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroy and where thieves do not break in or steal;  for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”  Matthew 6:19-21 NASB

Lesson #8-  We can do hard things in Christ.  Bowen’s life taught us not to let the pain of suffering consume us but to pour it into something positive for the greater good. His life took us to places we never imagined or thought were possible. After Bowen, I started running and training and qualified for the Boston Marathon in 2013. Sadly that was the same year the Boston bombing occurred.

'I can do all things through Christ who gives us strength.' Philippians 4:13Click To Tweet
I don’t have a picture with my medal smiling after the finish line, because we were trying to get safely back to our hotel in the midst of crowds, police cars and SWAT teams all around us. The bombing taught us when we run in fear there will always be another finish line to cross, when we run in the victory of Christ there is only one finish line to cross and never have to run in fear again.  The other picture is my husband at the finish line of the Iron Man he completed in AZ. We would have never have been able to accomplish all these things without the strength of Jesus and our son giving us the courage to say I can.

Lesson #7- Kindness Matters. Our Son’s life taught us every life matters and is valuable. Everyone deserves kindness no matter who they are. Kindness is a gift from God. If no one received kindness no one would know the love of Jesus.  Bowen’s life challenged us to extend kindness to others by doing a 13 Day Kindness challenge for everyday he was alive. Doing acts of kindness was so healing, and allowed the legacy of Bowen’s life to live on.  Giving kindness to someone can be the key to their breakthrough and the very thing they need. Be the kindness this world needs. Kindness is contagious. Pass it on.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another.”  Ephesians 4:13

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Lesson #6-  Life is Better together.  Even though we didn’t choose for our son’s life to be taken by this horrible disease, time and time again, every race we ran, every fundraiser, every event put on in honor of Bowen, brought people TOGETHER. Life is meant to do and LIVE TOGETHER in UNITY with one another.  Matthew 18:20- “For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them.”

1 Peter 4:8-9 “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.”

Lesson #5- How Beautiful are the Feet that Bring Good News. If there is One thing God is able to do is bring Beauty out of Ashes. Here are beautiful works of art people made for me after Bowen died. One is a beautiful portrait of our son where his his body is preserved untouched by his disease. Another is the Beautiful feet picture of the Bible verse in Romans 10:15. Another is a picture someone painted I didn’t even know, God placed in her heart to paint and give us this picture with the verse By His Stripes we are healed Isaiah 53:5. The last picture is a Bowen’s beautiful name tattooed on my foot, (thank goodness we will have beautiful feet in heaven LOL) for anyone who asks I can tell them how beautiful are the feet that bring good news—His name indeed brings good news, that we will see Him again One day in heaven. God is able to turn our Tests into Testimonies our Misery into His Message our Trials into Treasures.

Lesson #3-  Be Thankful.  Our son’s Life taught us to Be Thankful for what you have, it could always Be Worse. There is always something to Be thankful for no matter what your circumstances. Thankfulness helped us get through some very tough times—when we were grateful it turned what we had into enough and more than we ever needed. You never know when will be the last time to see a loved one or be here on this earth. Spending our time being grateful is time well spent.

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. #quote #MelodyBeattie
Lesson #2-  Live life with Adventure and with more margin. Bowen’s life allowed us to get rid of a lot of clutter and distractions in our lives and trade them in for making memories and adventures with our family.  More Margin allowed for schedules to be free to allow for spontaneous moments and for the unexpected. He showed us the meaning of seeking adventure and allowing room for it in our lives.  Leaving margin allows us to be available in God’s timing to be vessels when he needs us to be his hands and feet.  Click Here to watch our adventures from Alaska.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  2 Corinthians 12:9

 

Lesson #1-God Can Turn UnAnswered prayers Into Something Better.  God doesn’t always answer our prayers the way we want them but answers them in a bigger way than we could ever imagine.  We prayed for Bowen to be healed and for him to come home.  When he died, at first I thought God didn’t answer our prayers, Why?  But then I realized God did answer our prayers, just not in the way we wanted.  He indeed heal Bowen and brought him home to heaven.

Our son taught us—When God is all you have God is all have, God is all you need. There is no sorrow on earth that God can’t heal (David Crowder lyrics). Our son’s short life continues and will continue to teach us so much. We have valued and cherished our time with Bowen’s Hope but had to close this chapter of our lives. Even though this chapter closed, God continues to open new chapters and continues to use Bowen to be apart of our lives, just in a different way. He will continue to challenge us and make us step through new doors of opportunity wherever that may lead us.
Our son has taught us more in these 10 years than we would have ever done on our own. What the enemy uses for evil God will use for good (Genesis 50:20).Click To Tweet

God is good all the time no matter what our circumstances or trials we go through.  I hope and pray these lessons we’ve learned can be applies to our everyday lives and never forget why we are here–to love one another and allow our trials to grow us.

To celebrate and honor our son’s life for his 10 year anniversary, our goal is to have 10 kids through Compassion International be sponsored.  So far 3 kids have been sponsored and need 7 more families to reach our goal!  We have really enjoyed sponsoring Victor, who we started sponsoring after Bowen died.  Would you consider sponsoring a child?  To read our story visit instagram to read more.

 

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3 Ways To Pray For Your Family With Confidence

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3 Ways to Pray For Your Family With Confidence

If you are apart of a family most likely you know where they are.  Nowadays there are apps to locate loved ones or smart homes to let you know when they arrive home.  I am one that is not so technologically advanced and  have to rely on my kids or youtube to help me with certain tasks on the phone.

One app our family downloaded, is the Life 360 app which can tell me the exact location of my family.  I simply click on the app and pictures of my family pop up on the map of where they are located.  The app comes in handy when I’m  at work and it’s not my day to carpool.  I know when the kids arrive at school because the app alerts me, they arrived!  The app also tells me how much battery life each family member’s phone has to let me know if their phone is about to die in case I’m not able to get ahold of them.

Isn’t it nice to know the location of your family and they are safe?

Knowing the location of our families isn’t just important in the physical sense, knowing where they are spiritually is just as important.  We need to keep track, so we where they are and if they are safe.

3 Ways to Pray for Your Family With CONFIDENCE:

1.  Know Where They Are.  Can you confidently say 100% my loved one is going to heaven?  This is one of the most important questions to ask yet we shy away from it, why?  Because we’re afraid we might hurt feelings or don’t want to offend anyone?  Not asking you’re loved one where they are spiritually is a greater loss than asking them–Do they believe?  Knowing where they are spiritually can give you a better idea of how to pray for them.  Pray for opportunities to share Jesus in a non-confrontational way, pray for doors to be opened for you or others to speak truth and grace into their lives, for them to receive the love of Jesus.
“My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.” John 14:2-4
2.  Know Where They Are Going.  More than anything I want to confidently say all MY Family is going to heaven.  More than anything I want to say I will see them there one day.  In the above verses, Jesus is speaking to Thomas and at this point he’s confused and asks Jesus, “We don’t know where you are going.  How can we know the way?” (John 14:5 ESV).  Jesus then responds………..

Do you know where your family is going?

Praying for our family’s eternal salvation is one of the most important life changing prayers we can pray.  I have been praying for family members my whole life that one day they will accept Jesus and go to heaven.  Don’t give up, keep praying you never know how God will work.
3.  Know Where They’ve Been.  I’m not talking about in a creepy stalker way, I’m saying in a loving concerned way.  Can you say with confidence I know where my kids/family have been, what they’re doing, who they’ve been hanging out with?  Can you confidently say I know what they’ve been exposed to, for how long and if they are in safe situations?  We all slip up and make mistakes.  But allowing consistent patterns of losing track of where they are can create new paths of not knowing where they will be going.
We want to train up our children to be the ones that transform the world not be transformed by the world.  Pray you will stay alert, ask the right questions, that you’re loved one will open up to you and be honest.  Pray for opportunities to have good/hard conversations.  Pray you will have the right words to say and your loved one will be open to listen.
And above all seek wisdom and obedience.  A surrendered heart accepts the will of God better than any disobedient heart.
More than anything, I want to confidently say my family is safe and I know where they are going.  If you haven’t had that conversation with your loved, ask yourself why not?  What’s holding you back from asking?
God has planned a place for us.  He has planned a way for us to get there–through Jesus.  And He plans to come back to get us.  Will you and you’re family be ready?

“Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. 5 God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure”  (Ephesians 1:4-5 NLT).  

When we believe in Jesus and accept Him as our Lord and Savior, we are all apart of one big family.  How amazing will it be when we are reunited again with our loved ones?  How amazing will it be to know we are all in the same place?

Just as our phones can’t operate without being charged our physical lives can’t operate without sleep and nourishment, as our spiritual lives can’t survive without a relationship with God.  Staying in prayer, staying in His word, not only gives us the spiritual strength we need but also transforms our hearts and lives.  There is a Bible app that can help refill our spiritual lives that has lots of info of the place God has prepared for us.

We don’t have to have it all together to follow Jesus, in fact Jesus loves broken people.  He loves everyone no matter who they are.  When Jesus comes back he’s not going to ask us, “Do you believe everything the Bible says?”  He’s going to ask, “Do you believe I sent my son to die for you?”

If you are a believer, you become my sister or brother in Christ.  Nothing brings me more joy than to know my brothers and sisters are going to heaven.  We become apart of the same lineage, adopted into the same family.  If you’re struggling, it’s okay to wrestle with God and question why?  I promise you He has the answer to your pain, your heartache and struggle–His love.  God loves you more than anything.

Do you believe?

Can you confidently say all my family is going to heaven?  If not start praying with confidence!

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It’s All About Love

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Have you ever imagined what the world look like if love didn’t exist?  Life wouldn’t be worth living if love didn’t exist.  Love is why we exist and why God created us.

According to 1  Corinthians 13:1-3, If we have faith and not love we are nothing.  If  we give all that we have and not love, we gain nothing.  No matter what we say, what we believe, what we do, if we don’t have love, we are bankrupt.

In the English language, love is a very broadly used term.  We use it to describe food, people, relationships, clothes, etc.  There is not much distinction between what we really like versus what we really love.  For example, I love potato chips and I love my husband.  Even though I used love to describe both a thing and a person, the context of love is different.

So how do we differentiate the different types of love?  

The word love is used all throughout the Bible and has four different translations.  The definition of love is so much better understood when translated according to the type of love being described.  By learning the four different translations from the Greek language, we have a better understanding of what type of love the verses in the Bible are describing.

Agapē– means “love.”  It’s the highest form of love, charity; the selfless love God gives us and we give God. 

Philia– usually translated “brotherly love”, meaning friendship love. Where the city Philadelphia was named the “city of brotherly love”, now is the “city that loves you back.”

Storge– is also called “familial love”, it is the Greek word for natural affection, a love which a parent gives their offspring and vice versa.

Eros–  (erotic) Eros refers to “passionate love” or romantic love. 

As brothers and sisters in Christ, we are called to love each other with Agapē  love, the way God loves us.  

10 Bible Verses That Describe God’s Agape Love For Us-  

1.  God doesn’t merely love, He is love. 1 John 4:8 “God is Love.”

“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” 1 John 4:8-10

2.  Without love we are nothing.  1 Corinthians 13:3 MSG

“If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.”

3.  Everything God does flows from his love.  1 Cor. 13:4-7,13 NIV  

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”  1 Corinthians 13:4-7

4.  The epitome of God’s Agapē love, his sacrifice for us.  John 3:16

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

5.  A Father’s love for His son.  John 3:35

“The Father loves the Son and has placed everything in his hands.”

6.  Agapē love makes us united and complete.  John 17:23

“I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.”

7.  How a son loves his father through submission and obedience.  John 14:31

“but he comes so that the world may learn that I love the Father and do exactly what my Father has commanded me.“Come now; let us leave.”

8.  When we love others the way God loves us, others will know God’s love.  John 13:34-35

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

9.  We are apart of God’s family, we are his children.  1 John 3:1

“How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!  And that is what we are!

10.  When we give Agapē love for one another we are giving love the way God gives us.

“Whoever loves God must also love his brother.”  1 John 4:21

To follow Jesus is to love.  We are called to Love.  Let us love one another.

What Bible Verses remind you of God’s Agapē love for you?

How has God’s Agapē love affected you?

Our world could use some love right now.  As brothers and sisters in Christ, What can we do to show others God’s Agapē love?

“Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and truth.”  1 John 3:18
​
Go Deeper:  Family Bible Reading Challenge! Nothing grows our love stronger and deeper than when we fill our hearts and homes with God’s words, especially when we read scripture together!

Will you join me over the next 10 days?  Let’s do this together!

Want a way to show others God’s love?  Here are #FREE Valentine Printables for Valentine’s Day!  Click Here. 

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Join me next week as we dig deeper into the love of Jesus!  I would love to hear from you!  Leave Your Comments Below.  I pray your week is filled with God’s abundant love!  ​

Wikipedia was used to define the Love terminology definitions.

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The 7 Kindest People in the Bible

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Kindness.  It is something that touches our hearts and changes live deeply.   Kindness empowers others to be the difference and speaks volumes to those who receive it.  When I think of kindness I think of some of the people in the Bible.  

The 7 Kindest People in the Bible
7.  Niccodemus and Joseph of Arimethea–  These two men are known for preparing Jesus’s dead body for burial after he was crucified.  These two men risked everything;  losing their family, their religion, their status, their friends all to show their love for Jesus.  Even though Jesus was crucified as a criminal they wanted to give him a burial of a king.  Joseph even gave Jesus his own personal tomb! Their loving kindness was all apart of God’s plan.

6.  Pharaoh’s Daughter (Exodus 2:5-10)-  She is known for saving baby Moses from the river when he was laying in the reed basket.  Even though she knew he was a Hebrew baby (which her father ordered to have killed) she still took him in as her own to raise and care for him.

5.  Joseph (Genesis 37:12-36)-  Joseph is known for being sold into slavery by his 11 brothers.  In the time he was a away from home he had been falsely accused, thrown into prison, became an interpreter of dreams for Pharaoh and became in charge of Egypt.  When famine hit the land where his brothers lived, they came to Egypt to buy grain.  They did not know their brother was still alive and the governor of Egypt.  To their surprise, Joseph was not angry at his brothers but showed them compassion when he saw them again.  Instead of taking revenge, Joseph took them in and cared for them.  Joseph knew it was all apart of God’s plan, what his brothers intended for harm, but God intended it for good.” (Genesis 50:20)

4.  Boaz/Ruth-  (Ruth 3 and 4) To truly understand the relationship between Ruth and Boaz you will have to read Ruth 3 and 4.  Their relationship is so unique because Ruth showed kindness to Boaz in a way that truly touched his heart. In return, Boaz dedicated the rest of his life to her by making her his wife.

3.  The woman who washed Jesus feet with her hair (Luke 7:36-50)-  This woman who is not mentioned by name in the Bible, but by her actions showed Jesus one of the most compassionate acts of love by washing his feet with her tears and her hair and anointing his feet with expensive oil.  Even though he was invited to dinner by the Pharisees, not one of them offered to wash Jesus feet or even a drink of water a common custom done for guests.  The woman saw Jesus for who he was and poured out her love to him.

2.  Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37)-  The good Samaritan is known for stopping to help a man who was robbed, beaten and left for dead after a priest and a Levite saw him and passed him by.  The good Samaritan saw him, took pity on him, cared for him by bandaging his wounds and paying for his stay at the inn so he could recover.

1.  Jesus-  There is no one is kinder than Jesus.  When he walked upon this earth he showed us how to be kind to others in a way that goes beyond comprehension.  He showed compassion on the lepers, the prostitutes, the lame, the forgotten.  Jesus showed us there is no end to the kindness that can be given and should be given to everyone, everywhere at anytime.  He showed the ultimate kindness by giving us the gift of eternal life by dying on the cross for our sins.

Just imagine if Nicodemus and Joseph never took the time to show lovingkindness to Jesus, we would never have known the true power of the resurrection.

Imagine if Pharaoh’s daughter never took in Moses to care for him, we would never know the power of God’s miracles and the ability to use the unlikely.

Imagine if Joseph took revenge upon his brothers instead of loving them, we would never know the power of compassionate forgiveness.

What if Ruth didn’t show kindness to Boaz?  They would have never been married and Jesus would not have been part of the lineage to king David.  (Ruth and Boaz are the descendants of Jesus).

If the sinful woman never came to wash and anoint Jesus’s feet, we would never have seen the power of forgiveness given through her faith.

Because of the Good Samaritan’s kindness, generations have been able to model him as an example of how to treat others.

If Jesus never showed kindness when he was here, we would never know the love that is given to us from God. We love because he loved us first.Click To Tweet

I could go on and on about all the kind and loving things Jesus and the others in the Bible have done.  We are called to Be Kind and Loving to one another.  The love God gives us, is meant to be given and shared with others.

How will anyone know the love of Jesus if it is not shared with them?

How can you be an advocate for kindness?

You are loved by a God who loves you! How has kindness affected your life? How or in what way?Click To Tweet

Do you have a loved one you would like to honor by doing acts of kindness?  Do you like spreading kindness to others?  Kindness is contagious Pass it on!  Would you like more encouragement sent right to your inbox? Subscribe to my Blog or like my Author Facebook Page.  

FREE Printable Click Link to download 7 Ways to Show Kindness


Everyone deserves kindness from their Savior!  I would love to hear from you!  Please share how Kindness has affected your life how and in what way?  Or how do you like to spread kindness?

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